The First Steps to Conscious Parenting
Conscious Parenting: Rewarding yet challenging
Being a conscious parent is a wonderful and rewarding experience. You will learn a lot from it, and it will be challenging, but you will realize that even on the hardest times, at the end of the day being a parent is always worth it.
Children are human beings just like you and me, with their feelings, their needs, and their ups and downs, and it is your responsibility as a parent to be there for them when they need to be heard, loved, understood, or they just need to release their emotions.
Healing inner wounds
As humans we are expert imitators, and you will realize that not only your kids imitate your behavior, but you will find yourself imitating some old habits from your parents. Now, you might not have had an ideal upbringing, and you probably have some past childhood wounds and memories that begin to come out when you become a mother, or a father. This is the time to address these wounds and heal your inner child, as well as a great opportunity for growth and learning.
Being a conscious parent means being aware of what is happening within you and within your child, and taking action. Looking into your emotions and digging up your wounds is hard and takes time, but what better motivation than being the best parent possible for your kid?
Taking control of your own Emotions
The first step to conscious parenting is taking control of your own emotions. When you do, you have the ability to answer to your kid’s needs with love and an open mind, which will make them feel safe and loved.
On any given day, you will have plenty of opportunities to realize what triggers your anger and how you are responding to it. Being aware and paying attention to these reactions is a great place to start tuning in with your inner self. Listen to your heart, reflect on where your anger is coming from, and understand how those feelings are changing how you behave towards your kid, and what decisions you are making.
Go back to the situation and think “would I behave the same way if I was calm?”. This will make you aware of your own responses, and help you the next time a conflict arises.
Stop, Breathe, and Think
But being aware is not enough, you need to learn to press the stop button, breathe, and think before you release your anger on someone. If your kid is challenging you, maybe she or he is frustrated because something happened at school. As the parent and adult, is your responsibility to offer the support he or she needs: maybe a hug, talking, or being listened to. In order to offer this support, you need to learn to soften your voice even when you are angry, notice when you are overreacting, and take control of your own behavior is a key step in becoming a conscious parent.
Kids need unconditional love
Sometimes being a conscious parent also means asking for help when we cannot heal our past wounds. But if you are reading this, it means that you are already trying and that is the most important step! Being a parent will always keep challenging you, but remember that what our kids need the most is unconditional love, and someone who is there to listen and talk to them with an open heart.
If you enjoyed this article, we suggest to go and check out some of our other work as well. The other week Ragan released a indepth audio message through her “Steps on the Journey” Podcast series. This episode “Awaken The Conscious Parent In You” dives deep into the ego and the struggles that can arise when becoming a conscious parent.
Take a listen: “Awaken The Conscious Parent In You”
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